cpz designs Digital scrapbooking. Life. All mixed together

Thinking Thursday… Freakout Addition

Thursdays are going to be the day that I allow myself to babble on this blog. I might babble on other days too but Thursdays will be the official babble day. Feel free to join me with comments.

I am in a state of chaos. With some funk thrown in. I can't explain the funk, other than I feel like I could hyperventilate at any given moment. I'm not one to have panic attacks, or at least I don't think so. I've never had one that I know of, so maybe I have and just didn't realize it. Anyhoo.... life is good. Life is fine. Life is busy. Life is full of things that take up time and produce little or no results. Have I mentioned I am results-oriented? Yeah? Okay, so you know that.

So firstly, school is back in and with that, comes after-school activities and religious school. For Isabella, religious school is a big deal because this is the year she starts going twice a week and begins preparing for her bat mitzvah, which is in FOUR years. So the idea that we are on a four-year plan is something that would normally make me giddy with the possibilities, but for some reason, I'm stressing. I think its because it is something I have no control over whatsoever. I take her, she learns, I pick her up. I'm not involved at this point and that irks me. I suppose I could make myself involved and I probably will but right now, I don't have the energy to shove my busybody self into that process. Isabella gave up piano this year to start playing softball. I knew the day was coming, I she didn't let her give up piano without being absolutely certain she wouldn't want to go back. Her heart wasn't in it and it is not easy. Not that life is always easy but for heaven's sake, she's nine. It doesn't have to be hard either. So she's starting softball. Her choosing, with her dad's approval. And just to be clear... I. do not. like. sports. Its nothing personal. I just dislike them with an intensity that is overwhelming. I have no desire to go sit at a softball field and watch adorable young girls expend amazing energy and feel good about it. I will go to the games but it will be under complete duress. And that makes me feel like a bad mom. I KNOW I should want to go and see her enjoy herself and watch her improve and the self-esteem that goes with that and blah blah blah blah blah. So I'm mad at myself for not being a better mom. Sucks, don't it?

I started a part-time job. Everyone there is really great. But I don't want to talk about it because I told myself this blog is not about work. Work is separate. I'm good at my work, whether its real estate or accounting. Did I tell you I was an accountant in a prior current life? Yes, well that came back to bite me in the rear-end. And its okay. It could turn out to be something really great. So enough said, although being back in corporate America, albeit a really nice little corner of corporate America, is kinda tough after five years of working in shorts and sneakers at mom's house. Then again, putting makeup on every day and blowdrying my hair does have some benefits for my self-esteem. Did you know that Neutrogena is making some kickbutt concealer these days?

I'm also now the Digital Design Team Coordinator for Scrap N'Art. I'm super excited about it. Talk about a great bunch of women on this team. Everyone is amazingly talented and I feel a wee bit lame. But I'm darn good at organizing so I took the job and I get lots of freebies for it and that helps cover the costs of my hobby, which is a good thing in today's economy, right? The annoying thing about working on a mag is that I've made some really cool projects this past week or so. And I can't show you any of them. At all. Until Jan!!! How's that for frustrating? The only way you get to see them is to go subscribe to the magazine, which is only $9.99 a year, seriously? Can't beat that, but I'm not in sales, I'm just saying. I wish you could see the projects I made for the Nov/Dec issue. Too cute.

Girl Scouts is going like gangbusters. Our troop is off to a good start and our troop of 4th graders is running a rally tonight to tell other girls and parents about Girl Scouts. We're going to let all the girls who attend make SWAPs, aka Special Whatchamacallit Affectionately Pinned somewhere. Here's a peek at the SWAP we're making:

I know, cute, right? This is SO easy to make and every girl will make this little sleeping bag/bedroll and pin it on herself. And then my scouts are teaching a song. I'm giving a speech. Everyone claps. Then the girls come back and sing the song to their parents and then everyone wants to be a Girl Scout. And all the parents will fight over who gets to be the leaders of the new troops. Right? Right? Oh I really hope so because that's the toughest part of Girl Scouts - getting parents to STEP UP and lead. So I'm stressed over my rally, even though its organized up to my eyeballs and I know will go off with very few glitches. My girls rock. I know they will be fantastic.

Wow. This got really longwinded. Clearly, I needed to babble today. The weekend won't be easier, its going to be nuts. 16 girls. 4 moms. Girl Scout camp. At least we have cabins with walls and flushing toilets in the bathrooms. I'll let you know how that goes.